Feldkirchian Notes

From The Arthur Conan Doyle Encyclopedia

Feldkirchian Notes is a poem written by Arthur Conan Doyle published in his handwritten magazine The Feldkirchian Gazette (Vol. II, november 1875).


Feldkirchian Notes

By an emaciated victim of a tyrannical despot.


As down the passage I did go,
A fellow trod upon my toe.
By George, I loudly bellowed "Oh!"
And hopped about most actively

Old "Pipes" he giggled at the sight,
"I think, said he, it serves you right.
And gave me zwei for "aufmerksamkeit"
which vexed me most infernally

One day the man who serves the food
Came round much later than he should.
I eat as hard as 'ere I could,
And that is somewhat rapidly.94

I suffered on my plate to lie,
A piece that wouldn't choke a fly.
That week they gave me "ein bis zwei"
For "anstatt" in the refectory.

Immerged in some deep contemplation,
Solving a difficult equation
Forgetful of my situation,
I slept till Mire awakened me

Old Father Mire was very nice,
He gave me capital advice,
And also gave me "zwei" for "fleiss"
Which wasn't so acceptable

Thus on it goes from week to week.
Though I'm a quiet boy and meek,
I study hard my horrid Greek,
In silence time I never speak,
Behaving with propriety

Yet Prefects ever at me frowned,
And when the sunday night comes round
I always hear that hated sound,
of zwei and zwei and ein bis zwei.

AD